A Purposeful Prose Advice Column: Capturing Emotion in Prose

Dear Purposeful Prose,

I'm nervous about this because I'm being vulnerable, and I don't want to be. You've never judged me for this, and I appreciate that. At this point in my writing journey, I'm finding it difficult to write certain emotions for scenes and characters. I'll get to a point in the story where it's supposed to be happy and joyful. Then, I'll read back what I've written, and it feels stilted and unnatural.

Then, I'll write something negative, a certain kind of conflict, or I'll have a character experience a problem. I have more to add to this, but when I read those scenes back, they feel more natural to me right now. I'm not sure what to do with this. How do I move forward?

Let's start from the beginning. We're coming into this situation knowing a couple of different things. First of all, emotions make stories.

Second, people experience a wide range of emotions, not just one specific set. Different scenes and different displays of personality will call for different emotions. This is what we already know.

It's important to remember that what we feel, naturally, is hard to control. I'm not speaking as any kind of mental health professional. I'm just another person. Nobody here is going to force you to feel or express something that doesn't feel natural to you. Right now, this might not feel helpful because you want your story's path to go in a specific direction.

Since we're not going to force anyone to feel something that isn't there, we're going to move forward with the understanding that emotions earn their place in our experiences and our writing, and we're going to take a closer look at the process of earning emotions.

It is strange to use the word "earn" in this context, and of course, we don't earn emotions in the same way as we would earn money. In this context, you have a character who has a specific goal, has taken steps to meeting that goal, and has experienced some level of success.

Instead of centering on emotion, focus on the actions. When experiencing some measure of success, what might a person do? They might not always jump up and down, screaming. Some might, and that's fine. Sometimes, satisfaction looks like leaning back in your chair, smiling to yourself, and letting out a deep sigh of relief. Let those actions do some of that speaking for you.

Take a second to measure where that character is in life and what's natural for them. You've written something that feels unnatural, and you can probably identify why that is. Use that information to your advantage. You haven't written your final product, but even if you haven't said what you've meant to, you've given yourself a stepping stone you can use.

This step is slightly more common advice. See if you can recall the mood you want to capture. What is your relationship to that mood, and how did you express it? Do you have any personal artifacts like pictures, recordings, or even text messages that will help you to better recall your experiences? This is just about remembering.

One writer I worked with framed this step as a means of giving herself proof. She was writing about watching a string quartet at a wedding and the impact of that moment on her journey as an artist. She wanted to re-capture her emotions from that time to use in her writing. A process of recollection and journaling allowed her to remember the anticipation she felt before the event and, luckily, there were recordings from other guests.

This is another writer who had difficulty capturing an emotion. Instead of forcing herself to describe something that was difficult to capture at the moment, she allowed that moment to be earned.

I don't mean to make this sound easier than it is. It's not fully possible to replace a person's internal life with words, but we can acknowledge writing as an inherently emotional act. I like the way that K.M. Weiland explains how writers tap into their emotional range:

"For those of us who are heavily mind-identified, the challenge can be that we tend to write mechanically about emotions. We mentally understand what it is to feel love or grief or joy or anger, but we aren’t actually feeling. We’re just thinking about what it feels like. There is a visceral difference, and readers will notice."

What you're doing as a writer is expressing the emotion of your character and your scene, putting your mental conception of that feeling at the forefront. The "visceral" difference Weiland is describing is between your conception of the way an emotion fits with you as opposed to how your body responds to those emotions.

It's one thing to feel joy. It's another to stretch your arms to the sky without feeling any strain, as though a knot that was once inside you has been untied, and you allow yourself to laugh with nothing buried under the sound.

You don't have to do that right now, but you can give those experiences to the characters who need it. This can take time.

First, allow your characters or your scene to earn the emotions you want to convey. Justify their existence. You can use this as an opportunity to clear plot holes or to build character development in other ways.

Consider the emotions you want to express as physical actions. These can be exaggerated, but they don't have to be.

Gather proof of your experiences with emotions that you want to convey. Consider how you responded in words and in actions. If you have pictures, videos, keepsakes, or something in writing, use it.

Above all, give yourself the time you need to round out the experience you want to give through your writing. Emotions are what stories are built from. We have spent generations and lifetimes trying to understand the human experience, and I believe that stories will take us the farthest, so let's get one step closer with yours.

Thank you for writing in.

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